Florence Nightingale Revolutionizes Nursing (feat. Minka Kelly) – Drunk History


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Hello, my name is Paget Brewster. And today we will be discussing Florence Nightingale, the Mother of Modern Nursing. Wha–that was perfect! – Just rolled right off your tongue. – Did it not? – The mutter of mudern nursing. – Did I say “The mutter of mudern nursing”? – The mudder of muddern nurding. – Hi, I’m Paget Brewster, and today, we will be discussing Florence Nightingale, The Mutter of Modern Nursing. Okay, our story begins in 1830s England, which is the beginning of the Victorian Area.

  • Oh. – “Era.” – I’ve been there. – Shut it up now. – – Okay. So Florence Nightingale is the daughter of a very wealthy affluent family outside of London. And Florence is doing what everyone her age is doing. She’s a teenager and her mother says, Oh, this is so great. You’re just gonna study all this stuff. And then you’re gonna marry rich ’cause you’re rich, and you’re gonna have kids. And Florence is like, Ugh. I don’t think I want that at all. In fact, I like nursing. I like fixing people and helping people. And maybe I’m a weirdo, I don’t know.

And she started thinking, Oh, my God. Maybe God has chosen me for something greater than just being a rich lady. So she tells her parents, I don’t want to run a house. I just want to be a nurse. She wants to be a nurse, but nursing is not a profession. And at the age of 24, she leaves the house and starts interning at the Harley Street hospital in London. And in 1853, the War of Crimea breaks out. So– – Have you ever been in that river? – Huh? – “Cry me a” river? You never been there? – Oh, me. Oh, my God. – – Oh, God. Why do I want to kick you? – I get that. – I like you. Anyway. In 1854, the Secretary of War, Sidney Herbert writes a letter to Florence Nightingale saying, Florence, uh, you’re a great nurse.

I’ve heard about your work at the–at the something hospital I already forgot the name of. – Is that Harley? – Harley Street hospital. That’s right. I need you to go get a team of nurses together and go and help out our military doctors. So Florence was like, Yep, I’m on board. So Florence gathers together 38 nurses. And they go to the Scutari Barracks Hospital in Constantinople, which is a piece of shit. It was rats and lice. It’s not even a hospital; it’s a barracks. So they show up, and the male doctors, they flip the out. They’re like, these broads. We don’t need any chicks here. God damn it. This sucks. – Would you like me to help you? – Yes, please, Derek. You broke it! That’s pretty manly. Thank you. Gi– Don’t you– Give me my booze, bitch! All right, you’re in for it now.

So the doctor’s pissed off, and Florence is like, Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, I get that. It’s never happened before in history, but I’m here now, my ladies are here now. Florence and her nurses are shocked at the conditions, but they believe in Florence, and they’re like, All right. We’re gonna do whatever she says. Let’s go. Let’s clean this up. Two days later, thousands of soldiers injured from the Battle of Inkerman are brought into the barracks hospital. This was 3,000 soldiers laying on straw pallets. They are covered in their own excrement. They are bleeding. So the doctors are like, Oh, shit. it, we need your help. She ends up being known as the lady with the lamp, because it was this British woman there in Crimea, holding a lamp and visiting soldiers.

But one night, while she was changing the dressing of a man who had had an arm amputation, an army doctor walked in. And the man was naked. – But why? – Because they had no resources. And the doctor said to Florence, The are you doing? His dick is out. And Florence was like, you. His arm’s infected. – Holding for plane. – Oh, my God, we’re holding for a plane. Don’t kick me. – I have a twitch. – I am not a fan of this. I thought you were a gentleman. – Florence Nightingale. I thought you liked– – Oh, I’m a fan of Florence Nightingale, not you.

You ready? – – Shut up! I’m gonna kick you in the nuts! Bring your nuts closer so I can kick the– ’cause I’m tired. – – So all of these soldiers are amazed this lady with a lamp was protecting them. And the soldiers were saying to each other, This is the only person that’s cared about us. And Florence and her nurses have done everything they can do. Unfortunately, in the four months that they are first there, 4,777 soldiers die. And Florence says, I’m so angry. I’m so angry we lost so many men. And I need to find out why we failed. So the Crimean War ends in 1856. And Florence gets back to England. And she is awarded a $250,000 war fund dispensation gift from Queen Victoria. But Queen Victoria says, What happened in Crimea? And Florence says, I don’t know. It was bad. And I think I noticed a trend. And I’m gonna have to think about this. She is also really sick. She has the Crimean flu. I mean, bad, coughing, sputum. – What’s sputum? – Sputum’s an old term for mucus.

  • Too much informashe. – “Informashe”? – – I will not accept that from you. – Crimea river. – Shut up. you. I’m drunk. So… Florence goes back to England and just goes to her bed. She’s so ill that she stays in bed for 11 years. – What? – And it–yes. In those 11 years, she starts studying all of her notes from Constantinople. And she’s like, I know something was wrong here. And she’s building graphs. And she starts seeing a pattern. And she’s like, I think I figured out what happened. The men at the Scutari Hospital were ten times more likely to die from an infectious disease than from a war wound. That’s why we failed. It was hygiene. And she was like, Cleanliness is next to godliness.

So she presents all of this analytical data to Queen Victoria. And in 1859, she wrote a book called “Notes on Nursing.” Years go by, and Florence uses the money that Queen Victoria gave her to found the Nightingale School of Nursing, which is the first nursing school in the history of ever? Nursing didn’t exist until Florence Nightingale. Also, when Florence Nightingale is 87 years old, she received the Order of Merit from Queen Victoria, who still is kicking, and is like, This Florence is great! She fixed a bunch of shit. I like her moxie. This was the first time a woman was ever awarded the Order of Merit.

And that’s a big deal. – Are you okay? – Yeah, I burped. – I know. That looked aggressive. – It was not an aggressive burp. – I mean, aggressive as in, like, I wanna make sure you’re not gonna throw up. Okay? – You know I–I’m a lady. – Oh. Curtsy. – C–curtsy. Okay, you ready? So Florence Nightingale was responsible for pioneering an industry and giving women a job and a purpose that they weren’t allowed at that time. So what she did was really extraordinary. And it’s amazing. 159 years later, her book is still used in hospitals today. My math is not good. It might be 170-something. – Remember, it’s 2019. – Okay, I don’t like math. I want you to do it. Not because you’re a man. Well, kind of. – Uh…. .

As found on Youtube

 


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