Meghan McCain Is Disappointed by Senator Lindsey Graham’s Attachment to Trump

-Thank you for being here. -Thank you so much for having me. -And thank you for doing another talk show after you already did a talk show this morning. -Oh sure. -I appreciate you doing double duty. -Oh, no problem. I feel like a cool kid anytime I get to do anything that’s after in the afternoon. -Yeah, well that’s — Well, thank you for cool-kidding with us. And you were also a cool kid in that you were an intern at “SNL” when you were like 19 years old? -19, 20, yeah. -Okay, and I was there. I was in the cast then. Do you have any memories of me? And I’m hoping… -I do. -Okay.

-Yeah, you were a total gentleman. -Oh, good, good. -Very respectful of interns. -Thank you. There you go. -I remember, one time, I had to, like, clean up a table, and there were, like, magazines all over it, and they, like, made me organize it. And you helped me, so there you go. -There you go. That’s incredibly… -Nice guy, Seth. – Yeah. -It’s such a weird time in my life, and it’s a thing that people always ask about. People always want to know what the experience was like. And I — You know, even coming in this building, it’s just very nostalgic because there’s a page letting me in.

-Yeah, no, and a lot has stayed very much the same, not just the physical space. But there are things, like the page outfit, I don’t think has changed in 50 years. -They wear the same jacket. -Yeah. I’m always happy because it’s such a stressful place that when I meet people that used to be interns, I’m just so afraid that they — Well, somebody came up and gave me a piece of bad news, and I, like, took — like, I looked at them and was like, “What?” So I’m very happy that I was helping with magazine assortments instead.

-Everyone was wonderful. -Good. -I don’t know if I just, like — I also, like, you know, have worked at a lot of other places that, like, crazy things happen, and nothing ever happens to me. And I always wonder if, like, people were so scared of my dad or I just come off like a tough chick. I don’t know, but I had a wonderful internship. -That’s right. I probably took it out on one of the interns that wasn’t John McCain’s dad, yeah. Or John McCain’s daughter. Yeah. -Fixed a lot of problems, growing up. -So, I want to ask — you also had something — both your parents have been impersonated on “SNL,” and then it happened for you — Aidy Bryant did you. -Yeah. -And what was it like? I’m guessing maybe you weren’t watching live. When did you hear that Aidy had done you on the show? -I was on vacation with my husband, and I woke up in the morning, and I had a ton of — it was like, ding, ding, ding, ding when I turned on my phone.

And it was like, “You’re on ‘SNL,’ you’re on ‘SNL.'” And I was like, and then I brought it up on the computer. And Aidy and I went to high school together. -Which is crazy. -Xavier College Preparatory in Phoenix. So there you go. Thank you. So, it’s weird to be, like, have this girl I went to high school with impersonate me, which is amazing. And she’s so talented and incredible. And I watched it, and I thought it was hilarious.

And my husband thought it was hilarious, except they paint me out to be an anti-vaxxer, and he thought that was the most offensive part. He was like, “You’re not an anti-vaxxer.” -So, let’s use this time right now to just say to everyone that Meghan and I agree on vaccinating your kids. -Vaccinate your children. -There you go. -Thank you. -Common ground. -Yeah. -Thanks, guys. -You’ve obviously been very open and vocal about the fact that it is distressing to you, the fact that not only did Donald Trump attack your father in life, he is continuing to attack him after he passed away.

Are you — What do you think? If your dad was still around, like, do you think he would be delighted by the fact that Donald Trump cannot shake him from his psyche? -I mean, when he was alive, he was always like — I mean, this is a late night show, right? -Yeah, yeah, yeah. -So he’d be like, “I don’t give a .” I mean, you know, he just doesn’t care about people attacking him. He had been through so much. It was very hard to rattle him in any way. And it’s just strange that this sort of feud didn’t end when he passed.

-Yeah, historically, it tends to. -It should. But I think it says so much about where the President’s head’s at. And the last time he had attacked my father publicly on Twitter, it was the weekend, and I just remember when, you know, my life — when I spend my weekends, it was with my family in Arizona, hiking and cooking and camping. And I wish he would do that with his family on the weekends, instead of obsessing over my family. -Yeah. -And it’s very strange, so… -I think — -But it makes me, like, sad for them that you’re not — Like, life is really short. And I feel it a lot right now, and I think it’s because my father died a little over eight months ago, and I just feel every moment. And I think you… And this is a message to everybody, not just the President. But, like, spend the time off you have with those you love, because you don’t know if you’re going to get a phone call saying the person you love the most in the world has glioblastoma and has a year to live.

And I know what that looks like, and I just wish the President and his family would, like, really live in the moment. And you’re President, and I’m sure there’s a lot of interesting things to do in the White House, and spend time with your family. -Yeah, I will say, if the other alternative is camping, I think he’s still going to tweet about your dad. -Probably. -I don’t see him going out on — -Probably. -You know, obviously, they had a history where the President was very open about how he felt about your father. Your father, in turn, was very open with how he felt. They were not fans of each other. I imagine it must be harder for your family with someone like Senator Lindsey Graham, who was your father’s incredibly close friend and now has sort of tied his fortunes to the President. Is that a harder thing for your family to watch happen? -Well, first, I think that everyone in the Trump years sort of has to reconcile with their conscience and how — what role they played in it on all sides, because I think that he evokes the worst in all of us.

That’s my just take on who he is as President. I think he has ruffled up a lot of negative things in a lot of ways on both sides. I think, with — you know, Lindsey, I grew up with Lindsey Graham. I can call him Lindsey. And I considered him my father’s best friend and uncle for a really long time. And you know, he — It’s hard for me, and it disappoints me, but I also understand politics. And I will always love him and respect him. But, politically, I don’t understand it, because I think the idea probably is that politically you sort of have to, you know, make amends with Trump in one way or another, to be politically relevant and to gain re-election.

But my father was his biggest enemy, or, I guess, one of his political largest enemies, and he won his re-election handily in Arizona. And Arizona, up until that point, was a red state. Now it’s switched to purple. But it is possible. I just think it — You have to work harder. -Yeah. -And I don’t know if politicians want to do that, but I’m always going to love Lindsey. I’m always going to have a special place in my heart. But, you know, it — Of course, it disappoints me. -Yeah. -I mean, I think I would be inhuman if it didn’t. -If you said, ” That’s really cool, you be you.” -Well, it’s just — It’s strange, too, because people know their relationship. I mean, I think probably most people here know that, and people ask me a lot — quite a lot. -I don’t think Senator Graham made any secret of it, and I think that’s why he has to answer these questions now is, you know, when you have a friendship and you talk a lot about how much somebody means to you.

It’s very strange for people to watch you sort of reverse course on that. I want to ask about Ilhan Omar, Congresswoman from Minnesota. You know, she was — You were very vocal about some of her tweets. People were upset, thought it was anti-Semitic language. She has since unequivocally apologized for them. And then, after that, there was this tragic synagogue shooting in California. And you once again, sort of, on a Sunday show — a Sunday news show — brought up her tweets again in the context of that shooting. -On George Stephanopoulos. -On George Stephanopoulos. yeah. And I just wonder, cause I do think it’s fairly dangerous, and you brought it up after Congresswoman Omar had also had some death threats against her.

Do you think — you know, she’s obviously now stated she needs to be more careful with her language. Don’t you think other people who talk about her need to be a little bit more thoughtful, as well? Or do you stand by those comments of tying her to this — her rhetoric to the synagogue shooting? -I don’t think I tied her to it in particular. I think that I’m calling out what I see as anti-Semitic language.

And when you’re talking about how hypnotic — -But even after, you called it out after she’d apologized for it. I do want to establish the timeline. -I don’t — I think that Democrats are hedging on this, and I think it’s very dangerous. And I think Chuck Schumer and I are in alignment about Israel’s stance in geopolitical politics. I think it’s of the utmost importance. And I think she is bringing her party to the extreme — extremism on this, and I think we have to look to Europe and what’s happening over there.

And that they’re — You know, in the British politics, anti-Semitism is very common. And I see it happening over there, and I worry about it happening over here. I stand by every single thing I’ve said. And if that makes me unpopular in this room or in front of you, so be it. -Well, I don’t… See, that’s a weird thing that you would take the position of trying to be unpopular. Here I am, trying to, you know, find the common ground on this because I do think one of the — I think we can both agree — -Were you bothered by her language about 9/11? -I thought it was taken out of context. And I think, if you watch that whole speech — -Would you give President Trump the same leverage if he had said the same thing? -Well, I would say that Donald Trump is certainly in no position to criticize her language on 9/11, based on the things that he’s said about 9/11, right? -But would you give — I just think you have to give people the same credence, and I think she’s getting a lot of passes.

-Let me make the clarification between Donald Trump and Ilhan Omar, is one of them has apologized and said they’re going to try to do better, and they’re going to be educated by people who know about this. That’s what she said. And I think she… You know, it’s an interesting thing, when we have two Muslim women for the first time, they do have a different perspective on things. And I think, when we talk about the idea of like, “Let’s all try to meet in the middle on things,” we have to listen to other people’s perspective.

-Oh, I agree. I work on “The View” with Joy Behar every day. -I listen to other perspectives all the time. -Is there a way for people to talk about differences in Israeli policy without getting framed as anti-Semitic language? -Yeah, I just think you can’t talk about Jews hypnotizing the world, talking about “all about the Benjamins.” -You do keep bringing up the two tweets that she’s apologized for, and I think that’s a little unfair to her, especially because we’ve established — -Are you her publicist? -What? -Are you her press person? -No, I’m just someone who cares about the fact that there’s someone out there who is in a minority, who has had death threats against her, and I think that we should all use the same language that you’re asking her to be careful about her language. And I would ask everybody else to be careful about theirs. -Okay. Alright. I mean, I’m not sure what — What would you — What would make you happy, coming out of my mouth right now? I’m genuinely curious. -I’m perfectly happy with everything that’s coming out of your mouth, and I like that we spent this time together.

-Okay, you seem a little — I mean, I think, you know, my opinions are very strong, and I think sometimes because — -That is coming across. I do want you to know that. -But I’m on a network show. I’m on ABC. And I think sometimes, when you’re a hardcore conservative woman like I am, I think sometimes it’s daunting. I’m not on Fox News anymore. I’m on ABC. I think sometimes my beliefs, even though I do believe I represent the vast majority of people in red states, or at least a lot of women in the middle of the country who are pro-life, pro-NRA, you know, strong foreign policy, people who believe in limited and small government, I think that sometimes it tends to be jarring for people to see someone like me in mainstream news, not on Fox. -But I think it’s good that you are on mainstream news, You do have a platform. I mean, I think there’s this idea that maybe you’re saying unpopular things, but certainly ABC thinks it’s worth hearing.

So, you know, you have a platform, I have a platform. I think we’re very lucky. And I think we have to — -Oh yeah, I’m, like, so lucky. -Well, we’re in agreement on that, as well. Vaccinate your kids. Meghan McCain, everybody. Thank you so much for spending time with me. .

As found on Youtube

Sandler Family Reunion – SNL

>>> HIRES YOUR HEINEKEN, MR. SANDLER. >> COOL. >> SO COLD! LIKE BILLY MADISON. >> I GOT THAT, THAT’S VERY FUNNY. >> IF YOU DON’T MIND ME ASKING, HOW DO YOU COME UP WITH ALL YOUR CHARACTERS AND STUFF? >> I DON’T KNOW, THEY JUST KIND OF COME TO ME. >> THAT’S KIND OF A LAME ANSWER, ALL RIGHT. ENJOY YOUR REUNION. >> YEAH, THERE’S LOTS OF SANDLERS HERE, IT’S A SANDSTORM. >> HELLO, MR. HOLLYWOOD BIG SHOT. >> IT’S COUSIN RING, COUSIN MAC, GOOD TO SEE YOU. >> I WAS SO EXCITED WHEN I HEARD YOU COMING, I WAS — >> IT’S BEEN FOR YOU.

HOW HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN? >> TRYING TO GET MY REAL ESTATE LICENSE NOW, WHO KNOWS, WE SHALL SEE. >> GOOD LUCK. >> AS FOR ME, I GOT THE COURSE, VERY MESSY. >> SHUT UP! >> YOU SHUT UP! >> MAC, THERE’S KIDS HERE. OH, MY GOD, IS THAT MY NEPHEW SEAN? HE’S STILL AT THE KIDS’ TABLE. >> WILL SOMEBODY GET THIS KID A HAPPY MEAL? >> EXCUSE ME. MAY I HAVE EVERYONE’S ATTENTION, PLEASE. HELLO, SANDLERS.

> I JUST WANTED TO SAY, BIG HAND FOR RON BACON AND JANET SANDLER BACON FOR PLANNING THIS WHOLE THING. >> OUR PLEASURE. >> I’M NOT GREAT AT THIS, YOU ALL ARE DOING AN INVISIBLE CLARINET THING. IT DOESN’T MATTER. >> WE’RE SO HAPPY TO HAVE COUSIN ADAM THIS YEAR. WATCH WHAT YOU SAY ABOUT HIM BECAUSE YOU MIGHT END UP IN ONE OF HIS MOVIES. >> WHAT? I DON’T USE YOUR GUYS FOR MATERIAL. >> I DON’T KNOW ABOUT THAT, ADAM. BECAUSE NOW I SAW A MOVIE WHERE YOU PICKED SOMEONE WHO LOOKED JUST LIKE ME. I SEEN THAT ON THE BIG ‘OL SCREEN AND SAID, THAT’S ME UP THERE. >> NO, I PROMISE YOU, BOBBY BOUCHET IS NOT BASED ON YOU. >> I KNOW THAT, DEAR, I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE BIG DADDY MOVIE. >> NOT THAT EITHER. I CAN PROMISE YOU. >> I KNOW HAPPY GILMORE, THE CHUBS WAS BASED ON ME. HOW DO I KNOW THIS? A, MY FIRST NAME IS CHUBS. B, I HAVE A FAKE HAND. AND C, I’M A GOLF INSTRUCTOR. IT’S ALL IN THE HIPS.

YOU STOLE THAT FROM ME. >> ALL RIGHT, MAYBE A BORROWED SOME STUFF FROM YOU GUYS. I SWEAR TO YOU, I DIDN’T DO THAT A LOT. >> SHOULD YOU. EVERYBODY’S ENJOYING THE PARTY. >> ARE WE GOING TO DO THE KARAOKE NOW? >> THE KARAOKE IS CANCELED. >> COOL. ONCE AGAIN, SOMETHING THAT COULD HAVE BEEN BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION YESTERDAY. >> I’M GOING TO GO SAY HI TO MY MOTHER, WISH ME LUCK. >> HI, MA, GREAT TO SEE YOU. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE REUNION? >> THEY’RE ALL GOING TO LAUGH AT YOU. >> THEY’RE NOT LAUGHING, THEY LOVE ME. >> NO! >> COME ON, MA, BE NICE. >> THEY’RE ALL GOING TO LAUGH AT YOU. NO! NO! >> MA, STOP. >> NO SCLA! >> SHUT UP! >> WHY DON’T YOU SHUT UP. >> HOW ARE YOU DOING? >> BUT THE DOCTOR SAYS IT’S NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT. ASSOCIATION GOOD.

> HOW ABOUT I SING THE SANDLER FAMILY SONG. I WROTE IT 70 YEARS AGO. >> NO, NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR THAT. >> I WOULDN’T WANT TO DO THAT, I WOULD BE GREAT IF I DID THAT. >> I AGREE WITH MOTHER, LET’S TAKE A PICTURE. SNAP US. EVERYONE GET IN. >> OKAY. COME ON. STOP LOOKING AT ME, SHAWN. COME ON, TAKE THE PICTURE. TAKE IT. >> READY? ONE, TWO, THREE. .

As found on Youtube

Trump’s 2019 State of the Union Address: A Closer Look

-The theme of President Trump’s State of the Union address was supposed to be unity, and in the lead-up to the speech, Trump honored that theme by attacking Democrats. For more on this, it’s time for “A Closer Look.” ♪♪ Remember, this speech was supposed to be last week, but it was postponed due to the government shutdown. And as he prepared for tonight’s address, Trump was once again threatening the possibility of a second shutdown when government funding runs out on February 15th. Trump still wants Democrats to give him money for his border wall, even though public opinion is still firmly against him.

And that’s because he just keeps saying the same things over and over. Eventually people are just going to tune you out. Sure, the first time you see a crazy guy yelling on the subway, you move down to the other end of the car. But the 10th time you see one, you just put your headphones in and listen to a podcast about America’s mental-health crisis. For example — For example, here’s Trump yet again repeating his claim that previous presidents should have built a wall on the Southern border. -We’re going to strengthen up our Southern border. That should have been done 30 years ago, 40 years ago, 20 years ago, 10 years ago, 5 years ago. -Those are all the numbers he knows. And you know… You know he just threw in “5 years ago” because he wasn’t quite sure if Obama was president 10 years ago. Also, if anyone should be happy a previous president didn’t build a wall, it should be you.

If there was already a wall, what would people have chanted at your rallies? “Maintain the previously erected wall”? “Obama built the wall, but I’m going to keep it clean because it was filthy under Obama. A filthy, filthy, embarrassing wall. Oh, we’re going clean it. Oh, we’re going to clean it. Oh, you’re going — You’re going to eat off the wall.” Now, in his speech tonight, Trump claimed he was interested in bipartisan compromise, and even though he caved on the shutdown last month without getting any money for his wall, his allies on Fox News have been pretending it was actually a major victory. -He did not cave! He made a tactical decision, a strategy decision to pick the ground to fight on. -Anyone out there, by the way, thinking President Trump caved today, you don’t really know the Donald Trump I know. He right now holds all the cards.

-That’s right. Trump holds all the cards. Except he’s holding them facing out and upside down, and they’re Monopoly cards. “They are not Monopoly cards!” She screams, “He did not cave,” like she’s in a cave. In his speech to Congress tonight, Trump also repeated his claim that a border wall would stop crime and drugs from pouring into the country, despite the fact that immigrants commit crimes at a lower rate than native-born Americans, and most illegal drugs come through ports of entry.

Trump’s been making that same argument for years, and polls show most Americans still aren’t buying it. That’s why in the run-up to his speech tonight, Trump started making a new, dumber argument — walls work because cars have wheels. And what’s even more insane is that Republican senators like Ted Cruz have actually been repeating that argument. -They say a wall is medieval. Well, so is a wheel. A wheel is older than a wall, and I looked at every single car out there, even the really expensive ones that the Secret Service uses — And believe me. They are expensive. I said, “Do they all have wheels? Yes. Oh, I thought it was medieval.” -You know, the President has a good observation. He said, “I’ll tell you something else that’s medieval. The wheel.” There’s a reason the wheel is medieval, ’cause it rolls things and it works. Walls are effective. -You know what’s medieval? That beard. You look…

You look like you’re about to arrest Robin Hood. Now, that argument was so dumb, even Trump knew better than to include it in his speech tonight. Instead, the theme of tonight’s speech was supposed to be unity, even with the specter of a second government shutdown looming over the whole affair, which is why coming in to tonight, everyone was very eager to see the dynamic between Trump and House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, who would be sitting behind Trump for the first time. Remember, for the last two State of the Union speeches, Trump had Vice President Mike Pence and House Speaker Paul Ryan behind him, standing and cheering for everything he said like Southern pageant moms. “Yes, Kaley! You are servin’ looks tonight! Ka-ley!” And there’s a long history of the people sitting behind the President getting just as much attention during the State of the Union as the President himself.

Just look at former House Speaker John Boehner, who always glared at Obama like a supervillain plotting his revenge. Or former Vice President Joe Biden who always… …who always looked like he was going room to room at a house party, making sure everyone had enough booze. “You good, Chad? How about you, Rick? I’m making margs. Another marg, Chad? One more for you? Maybe just one big one, two straws? Gonna do a cannonball later. You guys might want to come out to the pool.” And the Trump/Pelosi dynamic — The dynamic is going to be especially fascinating to watch, given just how overmatched Trump has been in his negotiations with her over the last few weeks. Over the weekend, Trump told CBS he couldn’t get a deal done with Pelosi because she wouldn’t budge on anything. -You had quite the showdown with Speaker Pelosi. What did you learn about negotiating with her? -Well, I think that she was very rigid. -Yeah, of course, she’s rigid. It’s a negotiation.

This guy wrote “The Art of the Deal,” and he has no idea how a deal works. “I got to be honest. I feel like she and I want different things.” Trump was insistent as recently as last week that he would get the better of Pelosi, and he was confident that he’d get his wall. Let’s see how he felt about the status of the wall today just hours before his big speech. -President Trump tweeted this. “Tremendous numbers of people are coming up through Mexico in the hopes of flooding our Southern border. We have sent additional military. We will build a human wall if necessary.” -A human wall? He negotiated himself down from a concrete wall to a steel barrier to a fence to a human wall. Who are the humans in the wall anyway? Are you and your weird sons going to go down to the border and play red rover? “Red rover, red rover. Send immigrants over.” And there are all kind of State of the Union traditions most people don’t know about.

For example, every year, there’s one administration official appointed as a designated survivor who stays in a separate location in case disaster strikes, and tonight that designated survivor was Energy Secretary Rick Perry. Can you imagine hearing the news that the Capitol had been blown up and everyone had been killed and then hearing the newscaster say, “And so now we go live for an address from President Rick Perry”? I mean, at least we know what he’d say. -Oops. -And, in fact, before Trump’s speech even started, we already had one big “oops” moment — Trump’s weirdly crooked tie. Look at that. Trump — Trump is so unpopular, even his tie has moved to the left. Now, understanding what Trump is saying at any given moment can be difficult for casual observers, let alone professional politicians who are used to normal human syntax, which might explain why at one point Nancy Pelosi seemed to be reading along with a printed copy of the speech. She looks like a babysitter reading the rules of the board game while the kids are just chucking game pieces at each other.

She looks like she’s checking the playbill to see who the understudy is. “Ohh! Oh, it’s Alec Baldwin.” But this was the first time — This is the first time we got to see in real time the two different reactions of Pence on the one hand and Pelosi on the other, and it was very revealing. As he repeated the same talking points he often repeats at every speech, Pence applauded enthusiastically while Pelosi was much more muted. -African-American, Hispanic-American, and Asian-American unemployment have all reached their lowest levels ever recorded. -Look at them. Pence is like a dad who’s proud that his kid keyed the principal’s car, and Pelosi’s like a mom who’s thinking to herself, “I wish I had a daughter.” But the reactions were most telling when Trump alluded to the many investigations of his presidency, including investigations and oversight being conducted by Democrats in Congress and implied that those investigations were somehow hurting the economy.

-An economic miracle is taking place in the United States, and the only thing that can stop it are foolish wars, politics, or ridiculous partisan investigations. If there is going to be peace and legislation, there cannot be war and investigation. It just doesn’t work that way. -I’m sorry. You think the investigations are hurting the economy? If anything, you’ve created thousands of jobs for lawyers. This is such an insane argument. He’s like a guy who gets pulled over for drunk driving and says, “Officer, I can’t focus on the road with a breathalyzer in my mouth.” And eventually Trump got to the central promise of his campaign and presidency, the thing he shut down the government over — his wall.

And despite all the contradictory messages he’s sent over the past several weeks, Trump insisted that he would definitely get that wall. -My administration has sent to Congress a common-sense proposal to end the crisis on the Southern border. In the past, most of the people in this room voted for a wall. But the proper wall never got built. I will get it built. -Oh, you’re gonna get it built? You went from promising it would be a concrete wall to saying it would be a human wall. What’s next? “Walls work, and so do wheels, and that’s why the wall will be built out of wheels.

Oh, no! Oh, no! The wall’s rolling into the ocean! Oh, wheel wall! Oh, why?! Goodbye, wheel wall! I love you, wheel wall!” Trump then moved on to the economy, and when he mentioned the percentage of new jobs occupied by women, the record number of female freshmen Democrats in the audience started dancing like the cool aunts at a wedding. Trump then had the audacity to note the fact that more women were serving in Congress than ever before, as if he had something to do with it. -We also have more women serving in Congress than at any time before. -Look at Pelosi letting everyone know where those women are. Also, I love that Trump thinks he can take credit for that.

“The only reason they got elected is that most people hate me. You’re welcome, everyone.” In fact, a wave of Democrats was elected to Congress in November, running in part on a progressive economic agenda, with some, like Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, openly embracing the label of Democratic socialist. Democrats also ran in part against Trump’s deeply unpopular tax cut for corporations and the wealthy, and polls have shown support for policies like a wealth tax or a higher income tax for the richest Americans surging, even among Republicans. So Trump decided to take a swipe at the Democratic socialists in the room. -Here in the United States, we are alarmed by the new calls to adopt socialism in our country. America was founded on liberty and independence and not government coercion, domination, and control. We are born free, and we will stay free. -Look at Bernie’s face. That’s the face he makes when the waiter catches him stuffing sugar packets in his pocket.

“All the sugar packets are being hoarded by the millionaires and billionaires! Sugar to the people!” We’ve been here many times before. We all know the real Trump is the one who will reappear on Twitter tomorrow. In his speech tonight, he attacked the investigations of his presidency and repeated his demand for a border wall. He just recycled many of the same talking points he always uses. In other words, he went ’round and ’round like… -A wheel. -This has been “A Closer Look.” .

As found on Youtube

CLICK HERE TO VISIT AMAZON

The Perfect Mother – SNL

>>> BABE? BABE. CAN YOU JUST LIKE GIVE ME LIKE A MINUTE? >> JULIA. >> DAD. >> LET’S GIVE MOMMY AND GRANNY A MINUTE. >> THANK YOU. >> YEAH, OF COURSE. >> THERE YOU GO. >> MOM. I DON’T KNOW HOW YOU DID IT. >> DID WHAT, HONEY? >> RAISED ME WITHOUT GOING INSANE. I MEAN, LOOK AT ME. I’M A MESS. BUT YOU. YOU WERE JUST LIKE A PERFECT MOTHER. >> NO, I WASN’T. >> YES, YOU WERE. YOU WERE ALWAYS SO CALM AND SWEET WITH ME. >> THAT’S BECAUSE EVERY MOMENT WAS A JOY. >> . SLEEP! >> I DON’T EVEN REMEMBER YOU EVER YELLING AT ME. >> HOW COULD I YELL AT THIS FACE? >> OH, MY GOD, LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO THE TV! DID YOU JUST PUT PAINT ALL OVER THE TV? >> I JUST NEED A BREAK SOMETIMES. LIKE I’M COMPLETELY OVERWHELMED. DID YOU EVER FEEL LIKE THAT? >> IF I DID, I DON’T REMEMBER. ♪ HAPPY BIRTH ♪ >> I CAN BARELY MANAGE TO TAKE A SHOWER EVERY OTHER DAY. BUT YOU WERE ALWAYS SO PUT TOGETHER. >> ENJOYING THE SHOW, CHERYL? >> HELL, NO. >> YOU WERE PERFECT. I MEAN, EVEN WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER AND YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO HATE YOUR MOM, YOU WERE GREAT.

YOU NEVER JUDGED ME. YOU NEVER PRIED. >> WELL, IT WAS NONE OF MY BUSINESS. >> COMPARED TO YOU, I FEEL LIKE I’M NOT GOOD AT THIS. >> YOU ARE EVERY BIT THE MOTHER I WAS AND THEN SOME. MAYBE YOU FEEL LIKE THIS INSIDE, BUT OUTSIDE, YOU COME ACROSS AS SO RELAXED. >> WELL, I TRY NOT TO GET WORKED UP ABOUT THE LITTLE STUFF. >> WHY DIDN’T YOU PACK THE GODDAMN GIRAFFE? >> YOU SAID, “PACK A TOY!” >> I MEANT A GIRAFFE! >> YOU SAID — >> SHH. >> HEY, BABY. >> IT SEEMS LIKE YOU AND NICK STILL FIND TIME TO, YOU KNOW. >> MOM. I’LL JUST SAY THAT IN THE BEDROOM WE ARE STILL VERY MUCH A MARRIED COUPLE.

> SORRY. >> YOU ARE DOING AN AMAZING JOB. JUST REMEMBER TO CHERISH EVERY MOMENT. BECAUSE EACH DAY WITH YOUR CHILD IS SPECIAL. >> NICK, CAN YOU COME HELP ME? SHE BLEW OUT HER DIAPER. >> WHAT? >> SHE HAS ALL THE WAY UP HER BACK. >> OH, THAT’S UP TO HER NECK. >> AND EACH DAY YOU’LL EXPERIENCE SOMETHING NEW AND WONDERFUL. >> DR. KLEIN, MY DAUGHTER ATE TWO CRAYONS. >> NO, FIVE. >> SORRY, FIVE CRAYONS. DO WE NEED TO BRING HER IN? >> THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I NEEDED TO HEAR. SEE? YOU ARE A PERFECT MOTHER. >> SO ARE YOU, HONEY. YOU HAVE POOP IN YOUR HAIR. >> OH. .

As found on Youtube

Trump Plays Tough Guy With China

WELCOME, ONE AND ALL, TO “THE LATE SHOW.” I’M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT. LOOK, DOES ANYONE– ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) THANK YOU VERY MUCH. I HAVE AN IMPORTANT, IF PERSONAL QUESTION: DOES ANYONE HERE USE MONEY? A COUPLE OF PEOPLE DO. OKAY. IF SO, YOU MIGHT WANT TO RETHINK PUTTING IT IN THE STOCK MARKET AND INVEST IN SOMETHING MORE TABLE OVER USEFUL IN THE AFTER-TIMES, LIKE POTABLE WATER, OR SHEEP, OR FLAME-THROWING GUITARS, BECAUSE IT WAS A ROUGH DAY ON THE STOCK MARKET TODAY. THE DOW ENDED THE DAY DOWN 473 POINTS. AND I THINK WE HAVE FOOTAGE OF THE CLOSING BELL: ( CLOSING BELL MIXED WITH “PRIC IS RIGHT” DISAPPOINT THEME ) HERE’S WHAT CAUSED THE PLUNGE: YOU SEE, TRUMP HAS BEEN TRYING TO GET A TRADE DEAL WITH CHINA, AND THIS IS IMPORTANT BECAUSE CHINA’S PRINCIPLE EXPORT IS…

EVERYTHING YOU OWN. CHINESE TRADE NEGOTIATORS WERE SCHEDULED TO ARRIVE IN WASHINGTON FOR TALKS TOMORROW. RIGHT? TOMORROW. THINGS WERE LOOKING GOOD, BUT THEN ON SUNDAY, TRUMP TWEETED THIS: ( AS TRUMP ) “FOR TEN MONTHS, CHINA HAS BEEN PAYING TARIFFS TO THE U.S.A. OF 25% ON $50 BILLION OF HIGH TECH, AND 10% ON $200 BILLION OF OTHER GOODS. THESE PAYMENTS ARE PARTIALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR OUR GREAT ECONOMIC RESULTS. THE 10% WILL GO UP TO 25% ON FRIDAY. $325 BILLIONS DOLLARS, DOT, DOT, DOT.” OKAY, I’M GOING TO STOP RIGHT THERE AND POINT OUT THAT THE MAN WHO CONTROLS OUR ECONOMIC FUTURE, HAS IT IN THE PALM OF HIS HANDS, SAYS “BILLIONSES DOLLAR.” ( AS TRUMP ) “LOOK, LOOK, CHINA, IF I DON’T GETS MY MONEYS, MY BILLIONS DOLLARS, THERE’S GOING TO BE TROUBLES. DON’T MAKE ME PUT MY RINGS ON.” BUT TRUMP ASSURED THE AMERICAN PEOPLE ( AS TRUMP ) “THE TARIFFS PAID TO THE U.S.A.

HAVE HAD LITTLE IMPACT ON PRODUCT COST, MOSTLY BORNE BY CHINA.” OF COURSE, TRUMP IS LYING IN THAT TWEET, AND HERE’S HOW YOU KNOW… HE’S THE ONE SAYING IT. ALSO, ALL THE– ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) SURE. ALSO, U.S.-BASED COMPANIES PAY THE ADDITIONAL MONEY AND OFTEN END UP PASSING THESE COSTS ON TO AMERICAN CONSUMERS. SO HE’S WILLING TO TANK THE ECONOMY JUST TO LOOK LIKE A TOUGH GUY WITH CHINA. ( AS TRUMP ) “HEY, CHINA, WANNA SEE HOW STRONG I AM? WELL, STAND BACK WHILE I PUNCH MYSELF IN THE FACE. HERE IT COMES.” NOW– ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) “IT’S OKAY, I’VE GOT ALL THIS PADDING.” NOW, TRUMP’S THREAT TO RAISE TARIFFS WAS NOT WELL RECEIVED BY THE CHINESE. THEY ISSUED THIS OFFICIAL GOVERNMENT RESPONSE: “DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.” ( LAUGHTER ) NO WORRIES THERE.

HE DOES NOT THINK. CHINESE SOCIAL MEDIA– ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) CHINESE SOCIAL MEDIA CIRCULATED A MEME OF TRUMP AS THANOS. GREAT, GREAT! SO NOW I WON’T UNDERSTAND WHAT TRUMP’S DOING UNLESS I WATCH “ANT MAN AND THE WASP.” ( LAUGHTER ) BUT THE BIG STORY IS EVERYTHING THAT’S NOT HAPPENING IN WASHINGTON. ON THURSDAY, ATTORNEY GENERAL WILLIAM BARR DID NOT APPEAR BEFORE THE HOUSE JUDICIARY COMMITTEE, WHERE HE DID NOT HAVE TO ANSWER QUESTIONS ABOUT ALL THE THINGS HE DID NOT DISCLOSE ABOUT THE MUELLER REPORT, WHICH DID NOT EXONERATE THE PRESIDENT. SO, IN SHORT, WE HAVE A FUNCTIONING DEMOCRACY– NOT. ( LAUGHTER ) THE HOUSE JUDICIARY COMMITTEE ALSO SUBPOENAED THE RECORDS OF FORMER WHITE HOUSE COUNSEL AND MAN INDICATING WHO DEALT IT, ( LAUGHTER ) DON McGAHN. NOW, McGAHN’S TESTIMONY TO ROBERT MUELLER IS WHERE MANY OF THE EXAMPLES OF OBSTRUCTION IN THE MUELLER REPORT COME FROM. THAT’S WHY THE HOUSE WANTS McGAHN’S DOCUMENTS. BUT THIS MORNING, THE “WHITE HOUSE ORDERED McGAHN NOT TO COMPLY WITH THE CONGRESSIONAL SUBPOENA.” CLEARLY, THEY’RE AFRAID OF WHAT HIS PAPERS WILL REVEAL, BECAUSE YOU KNOW THE OLD SAYING: IF YOU DON’T HAVE ANYTHING NICE TO SAY, YOU PROBABLY WORKED FOR DONALD TRUMP.

( LAUGHTER ) OF COURSE, THE BIG QUESTION, THE BIG– ( APPLAUSE ) CHILLY. CHILLY. IT’S FROSTY IN HERE TONIGHT. THE BIG QUESTION REMAINS WILL ROBERT MUELLER TESTIFY? AND THE BIG ANSWER REMAINS, AND THE BIG ANSWER REMAINS, “I DUNNO.” TRUMP HAS TWEETED HE DOESN’T WANT MUELLER TO TESTIFY, WHILE ATTORNEY GENERAL BILL BARR HAS INDICATED REPEATEDLY THAT HE WOULD ALLOW MUELLER TO TESTIFY. AND THAT’S IMPORTANT, BECAUSE AS THE HEAD OF THE JUSTICE DEPARTMENT AND MUELLER’S BOSS, BARR COULD ATTEMPT TO BLOCK THE TESTIMONY IF HE CHOOSES. OKAY, HE CAN DO THAT. JUST LIKE HOW, AS A CBS EMPLOYEE, MY BOSSES CAN BLOCK ME FROM GOING ON “NAKED AND A AFRAID, EVEN THOUGH– EVEN THOUGH, I AM BOTH OF THOSE THINGS, AT LEAST TWICE A DAY. NOW– OFTEN AT THE SAME TIME.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) OFTEN AT THE SAME TIME. >> Jon: AT THE SAME TIME, WHY IS THAT? OH,IA. >> Stephe: NO WONDER TRUMP WANTS EVERYONE TO DROP THIS MUELLER STUFF. MOST PEOPLE IT TURNS OUT DON’T BELIEVE HE WAS “TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY EXONERATED.” IN FACT, JUST 50% OF FOX NEWS VIEWERS BUY TRUMP’S CLAIM THE MUELLER REPORT CLEARED HIM. THEY DON’T KNOW WHETHER TO BELIEVE THE PRESIDENT. THAT’S AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS FOR FOX VIEWERS. AND THAT DEEP UNCERTAINTY HAS STARTED SHOWING UP IN ADS LIKE, “I’M NOT EVEN SURE THIS IS MY PILLOW.” ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE ) BUT– “HAVE YOU CHEATED ON ME! HAVE YOU CHEATED ON ME!” BUT IT’S NOT JUST MUELLER. TRUMP REFUSES TO COOPERATE WITH CONGRESS ON ANYTHING. FOR INSTANCE, LAST NIGHT, WE GOT A BIG ANNOUNCEMENT FROM TREASURY SECRETARY AND MAN TRYING TO DARTH VADER-STRANGLE A REPORTER, STEVE MNUCHIN. LAST NIGHT, MNUCHIN REJECTED HOUSE DEMOCRATS’ DEMAND TO HAND OVER TRUMP’S TAX RETURNS. ( AS MNUCHIN ) “YOU CAN HAVE HIS TAX RETURNS WHEN YOU PRY THEM FROM MY COLD, DEAD HANDS. RIGHT NOW, THEY’RE JUST COLD.” ( LAUGHTER ) SO, TRUMP DOESN’T WANT MUELLER TO TESTIFY. WE CAN’T SEE McGAHN’S NOTES. WE CAN’T SEE TRUMP’S TAXES. SO FAR, THE ONLY THING TRUMP’S NOT COVERING UP IS JUST AROUND HIS EYES.

( LAUGHTER ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) SURE, SURE. THAT’S WHAT’S GOING ON. THAT’S WHAT’S GOING ON. ( AS TRUMP ) “LOOK, I’D SHOW YOU THE REST, BUT MY FACE IS UNDER AUDIT.” ( LAUGHTER ) NOW, THEY DEMANDED TRUMP’S TAX RETURNS UNDER A 1924 LAW STIPULATING THAT THE SECRETARY “SHALL FURNISH” SUCH RECORDS TO CONGRESSIONAL COMMITTEES. “SHALL.” YOU KNOW IT’S IMPORTANT WHEN YOU SAY “SHALL.” ONLY GOD USE “SHALL,” OKAY. “SHALL” RARELY SEEN OUTSIDE OF STONE TABLETS. BUT MNUCHIN CLAIMED THE REQUEST “LACKS A LEGITIMATE LEGISLATIVE PURPOSE.” WELL, THERE YOU GO. THERE YOU GO. HE STOPS IT. HE STOPS IT. CONGRESS WANTS IT, THEY’VE GOT THE LAW, AND IT DOESN’T HAPPEN BECAUSE IT’S RIGHT THERE IN THE CONSTITUTION: ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) YEAH, YEAH. “NO, NO, YOU CAN’T HAVE IT.” ( LAUGHTER ) THE “NUCH” CONTINUED, “THE DEPARTMENT IS, THEREFORE, NOT AUTHORIZED TO DISCLOSE THE REQUESTED RETURNS.” AGAIN, THIS IS CONGRESS’ JOB TO DECIDE, NOT MNUCHIN’S. THERE’S A REASON TRIALS DON’T END WITH THE JUDGE ASKING FOR A VERDICT FROM THE DEFENSE ATTORNEY. “YOUR HONOR, I MAY JUST BE A SIMPLE COUNTRY LAWYER, BUT I FIND MY CLIENT NOT GUILTY– OBJECTION! SUSTAINED! BAILIFF, LOCK UP THE JUDGE! NO, YOU’RE OUT OF ORDER.” “DO YOUR DUTY.” SO TRUMP WON’T GIVE THE COEQUAL BRANCH OF GOVERNMENT, CONGRESS, ANY OF THE THINGS THAT THEY HAVE SUBPOENAED.

WHAT CAN THE DEMOCRATS DO ABOUT THAT? WELL, ONE SOLUTION IS TO IMPEACH TRUMP, BUT THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT HE WANTS, ACCORDING TO THE PERSON WHO COULD MAKE THAT HAPPEN. >> TRUMP IS GOADING US TO IMPEACH HIM. THAT’S WHAT HE’S DOING. EVERY SINGLE DAY, HE’S JUST, LIKE, TAUNTING, TAUNTING, TAUNTING. >> Stephen: (AS TRUMP) “HEY, FANCY NANCY. ( LAUGHTER ) WHAT? IS GROSSY PELOSI TOO SCARED TO MAKE A SPEECHY ABOUT IMPEACHY? NANNY, NANNY, BOO-BOO. YOU WON’T DEFEND THE CONSTI-TOO-TOO. BAWK, BAWK, BAWK, BAWK, BAWK, BAWK.” .

As found on Youtube